By Adam Crosthwaite
A single moment, just like a flash, is all it takes to change a world. Even a world as small as one corner of a person’s life that is in the process of challenging itself to get up, or a universe teaming with life sprawled out over light years, this process may appear to follow a universal formula for sudden awareness. One might even say it was so obvious that some ancient culture from centuries before had been writing about such events in a pictorial script on walls and tablets.
There are different ways to bring about changes within any space. In the ongoing explorations of the mysteries of Qabalah, as I continue to be taught by Rev. David Strickler, the primary focus is on the personal space thus far. In working with mental and emotional energies using the principles of spiritual alchemy changes within one’s own personal sphere of influence become possible and spiritual growth may occur. This is mostly a process of cleaning up and clearing out energies and habits. In this clearing of the way not only is there a change in perceptions and attitudes but the receptivity to higher consciousness is opened up and honed. Years of practice, study and application helped guide initiates as they continually seek out the lessons and advice of the Masters, such as Rev. Strickler, who have walked the path and aid those along the way.
Finding the Will to Get Up!
Along the path there are many challenges, some which appear to throw one to the ground, brought on by an number of factors many from outside our own personal circle but most, and the more devious, are those from within our own circle; each of us with our own personal, emotional and mental baggage or rather “spiritual disorders”. Part of the challenge can be to get up, having been thrown to the ground. These challenges can stay with a person until resolved for whatever the reason. Along the path I have encountered many of these challenges, some without knowing what they were, but each one just as capable of throwing me off my path, or down to the ground on my path, as the next.
Recently my world has been changed by a clearing of my own perception. I had been struggling with some personal problems that managed to manifest into physical health issues, mostly weight gain. Strangely, I had no idea that this was happening. Actually I knew something was wrong, I just had no idea that it was at affect with something from deep within my past. This whole time I was looking at my present mindset and thinking that I was just being lazy or momentarily careless about my own well-being. You see, a long time ago I learned that I was good enough at certain things in school and some other areas where work was hard, I could slack off without getting noticed. What started out as a kid thinking he was gaming the system turned into a man who didn’t expect to be challenged as much as he was later on in life. I found myself in a struggle to get up off the mat of Life.
The alchemical mixture of sloppy behavior and unethical mindset has been in place and hiding, waiting for the perfect setting to spill over and try to infect other areas of my mental and emotional laboratory that I have been working on cleaning and building for twelve years as student of Rev. Strickler’s. After a few years of slippery situations and seemingly chaotic events it takes a slap in the face in the form of a doctor’s diagnosis and a few months later a sucker punch from an employer with a pink slip drive home the message, “YOU HAVE A PROBLEM!”
There is much more to my challenge than I am letting be known, but I am sure the details would just drone on and not serve the writing very well; not all disclosure is for public consumption. Those who have been a part of my journey know as they have been there, for those who don’t just imagine temporally losing a loved one and a few years later losing one that you spent a good portion of your adult life trying to find.
I was brought down to the level of self-pity and doubt, feeling pinned down to the ground. I was just trying not to panic while in panic mode for days. I couldn’t make sense of things for a day or two until I crashed out and didn’t do anything for a day. It wasn’t until I started to move that things started to clear up and make since. Suddenly I knew what to do, I needed to get up off the ground. I woke up one day and I started with just cleaning my space a little. It started with clearing out an area to work with. Then I counseled a few memberships on line then updated my resume and started to apply for work. In a flash, my world once again had changed. I could hear a voice from somewhere telling me to get up and move, to get up and get going. At times it sounds like my mentor Rev. Strickler, just as if I was sitting with him and he was speaking to me directly, other times it is a voice similar to my own but bigger and clearer than the whispering voice I am used to.
The irony of this experience is that I was convinced that I didn’t make the changes necessary to change my situation quick enough to break out of the rut I was in mentally and physically once I was aware of them. It was a month after the first awareness of how far reaching my problem was which was six months after finally accepting the doctor’s diagnosis. The final blow from work hit. Even in the process of making changes, more fallout from events can continue to disrupt things, from the simplest most mundane aspects to the larger more threatening situations that may irrevocably affect your life. It all depends on the size and scope of the events involved.
Now I am working a new job, one that took only two days to find and get after choosing to move; it is the exact opposite of the one I had. I went from a comfortable air conditioned building to walking around all night locking up buildings in the beginning of the monsoon season in Phoenix, Arizona. I get all the fresh air and exercise I can handle! No more sitting around the office for hours on end watching monitors or reading. Now I have to eat right to keep in decent shape, so no more fast food short cuts every night or pizza delivery late night at work. In a flash my lifestyle was changed.
For all the study and practice over the last twelve years as an initiate in the art of Qabalah, I still needed a little help to get up off the ground and push me in the right direction, to get me under way even though I was ready all along. It is very easy to become wrapped up in illusions when your guard is down. That is why it’s important to have some type of emotional and mental conditioning. There are aspects of the alchemical process in the Q tradition of Qabalah that aid and teach in these manners, but one never truly understands them until they have undergone the experience of having to rely on them when faced with a challenge.
I can remember many times in the middle of a fight and looking to the sidelines and seeing my teacher yelling at me to ‘Get Up!’ I finally became aware, engaged in the situation fully to make changes. In the past Rev. Strickler has used the image of the mentor standing by and watching his student from the sidelines as they train and fight in the ring. With the patience of a true master, Rev. Strickler has used image as a metaphor to explain to me how he watched over and waited for his student to engage the process and make the changes that have been worked for so long. There will be times when it feels as if there is nothing more to do, that no matter, what nothing will get better. That is a dangerous time to be down and unwilling to find the ability to get up and keep moving. Even more so when you are up against yourself and all your spiritual disorders, also referred to as the shadow self, the darker part of the inner person created from within.
The shadow self is smooth and can use any number of exploitable vulnerabilities just like a computer virus as a type of sabotage against the efforts of the self attempting to find expression of the true or higher in the physical world. Few things in life are as scary as the realization that you have been under the influence of a shadow.
All the preparation and training in the world is useless to a person who is unable to function when under pressure. Knowing there is a problem can help, but will not do much to effect the situation for the better. It is through the engagement of Will that allows for changes to occur in the world. No matter how big or small a change or world, no movement means there can be no engagement of the energies present.
No matter how dark or overwhelming the situation may seem if you listen closely enough, you may hear someone silently cheering for you. Even if you don’t see any one, there is always a voice saying, “Get up! Get up, Now!”
Copyright © 2016 by Institute of Spiritual Climate LLC