“La Lavado Del Gato – You Bathe Like a Cat”

By Adam Crosthwaite

Attempting to Avoid the Unavoidable While Trying to Look Good

The process of revelation is both relentless and subtle as those who seek the path experience the endless unfoldment of knowledge of the true self and the shadow self as different pathways to enlightenment. Revelation may be lurking around any bend; you just need to be prepared for it.  My experience has shown me that while the draw of discovery has a sense of sweet and bitterness; it is the later of these two extremes that I have found myself in the past, and at times in present, avoiding. The harder I fought to insulate myself from the discomfort of accepting and dealing with my own issues in order to overcome and evolve, I would start experiencing an increase in friction in my life circumstances. In attempting to insulate myself, I created a situation where more pressure was needed to get through the layers I thought I had so cleverly set up. Somehow my misuse of energy was going to back fire on me.

For twelve years now I have been a student of Rev. David Strickler. With each year I find myself looking back at all the times I would see myself falling into the same pattern of avoidance. While the instances of this diminish in both frequency and duration, trace elements of operant conditioning linger, waiting to be picked up and transformed, or simply incinerated through action in the ongoing Alchemical process I have become aware of during the last twelve years with the Master Teacher.

Unfortunately the obvious is not always so clear while operating in the mundane world from a subjective view, so super consciousness finds avenues in which to pass along messages, each one encoded and sealed with layers of meaning and understanding that reveal themselves over time to the recipient. Providing that the recipient is ready and willing to receive, the message will be understood clearly; if not it may take time or even a more energetic form of communication. I have had Rev. Strickler explain how this processes works and yet from time to time I would hear from him comments such as, “I can’t believe how long it took you to get that message.” Or “It actually took someone having to say it out loud for you to get the message”.   Learning the art of self-evaluation has been an invaluable aid in helping me to get a better grasp on this form of communication.

It has been my experience that the process of self-evaluation is not an easy course to learn at first.  All the habits of avoidance tend to line themselves up in neat little rows, from the simplest and most plausible to the grandiose and obscure; once you think things have been figured and all accounted for, everything changes and the avoidance mechanisms of the past come rolling at you in full roaring glory.  It is in the moments of retrospect that I recall the frustration in my parent’s eyes as I belligerently refused to do anything they tried to set in front of me, from not going to bed or eating my vegetables, to turning in my homework on time that they watched me complete night after night for school.  It is like a child who refuses to do chores and can become aggravating at times to those who know.  Personally I can only account for the frustration I had dealt myself throughout my course in self-discovery as I find new and interesting ways to distract and confuse situations leading myself down dead end after dead end.  Yet it is in this process of self-exploration/evaluation that I realized I set the template for this course and I can reframe the same template to better serve my progress instead of sabotaging it.

One of these messages came to me a while back, about seven years ago actually, and I still keep finding myself revisiting that moment with renewed understanding. As a point of reference this very article was originally about that day and how it affected me a year later. This is about the fifth revision on the same writing since then.

I was walking around one day talking with one of my coworkers, discussing the differences between our cultures.  He is a forty five year old Puerto Rican from New York City, at time I was a twenty eight year old Scotch-Irish “kid” from Denver Colorado.  We had been talking about the differences between having a large family help raise children as was the case in his family and a small family around to raise children as in the case of my family.

He shared with me one thing that his grandmother told him when he was a little boy, “La lavado del gato – You bathe like a cat.”  He explained to me that she was telling him he would clean everything but his rear end, just like a cat.  I turned and smiled at him, “I like that!”  Never did I hear a more poignant statement regarding the personal and impersonal observations about people and their many behaviors, or at time lack thereof, witnessed day to day around the world.  Something inside of me grabbed on to this idea, knowing it was important to hold on to, not so much from the hygiene angle but from the angle of human behavior and attitudes.  After all it was the observation of a generational persona that sparked the conversation in the first place.

Although my friend was not aware of it at the time I asked him if he could repeat that and I wrote it down as quote.  At the time I was so enthralled in the greatness of my own ego that it never occurred to me the process of revelation was just starting to unfold.  Later I would come to realize that the message delivered by the inner teacher was more direct and I had missed the mark as I clumsily tripped over my shadow not paying attention to the obvious clue set out in front of me.

Generally people tend to focus on their appearance a good majority of the time.   I have watched people, myself included, worry about the little details of their appearance so not to give off the wrong impression or perhaps in order to give off the right impression about themselves; such regard for mundane details as are my side burns the right length?  Is anyone going to notice the last remaining hairs of stubble I missed while shaving?   But what about the unseen aspects of a person that go noticed by others, regardless of any physical changes which may or may not have been made?

What about the unforgiving stench that permeates through fabric of the personality with its origin somewhere in the so called hard to reach areas of the mind?  I can go through the day face to face with people getting laughs and making my best performance so believable that no one would ever think there may be much more going on under the surface.  The behavior presented for public disclosure and interaction may get me through the day, but at home in the darkest hours of the day when there are no witnesses but me, myself, and I, there is an undeniable truth that something stinks and it is not just the garbage at the front door I gracefully avoid grabbing on my way out the to the car eight hours ago.   If I walked into a room full of people and someone said, “Adam’s here, where is the air freshener?” I would definitely take a hint.  However that is not always the case when people speak up in a room full of people and someone says, “It’s getting deep in here, let me get my boots!”

People have this habit of cleaning themselves like a cat.  From nose to tail a cat will stroke and polish.  Every little piece of dirt and unclean hair is cleaned, polished and combed all nice and clean from tip to tip, save for one tiny little piece of real-estate that seems to go untouched by the cat’s preening and primping regime.  While this may be acceptable for felines I have yet to witness a human walking around in public without cleaning that most personal area and getting away with it.  I have seen people not allowed onto busses, dates cancelled, and even college students sent home for such an attempt. However, this article is not so much about physical personal hygiene as it is about the personal hygiene of the psyche.

The primping of a persona takes more effort than working on the genuine structure of a person, yet every day I watch myself and others parade around as if they were acting like little Chihuahuas pretending to be great Danes waiting for someone to give them a doggie biscuit for looking good.  What seems to be socially acceptable in this case is nothing more than a defensive mechanism set out before the rest of the world.  Ironically the trap is laid from the moment a person accepts the persona as their true identity and continues to elude the sincerity of what is and what is not their true self.  No one is going to clean up the mess left behind as a person stumbles through life making mistakes and leaving behind a wake of chaos. No one is going to come over and pick up the laundry or vacuum the floors or take out the garbage.  Mom will not come over and give junior an allowance for cleaning his room so he can have Kool-Aid money for after school.

Through the process of self-evaluation the old patterns of operant conditioning can be revealed and new forms of operation can be set in place. Active observation leads to questions and the focusing of the intent on this process aids in the opening of understanding the truth beyond the shadow of perception.

If not for the ability to question, how would one ever find a way to the truth that lies hidden with behind the dark veil of the unconscious mind? Why do things seem to not work out the way I intended? What is it that I don’t see keeping me from my goals? Why is it every time I start something, I never finish it? When did this pattern first appear? How did this become a pattern? Where did I find myself engaged in avoidance? Why is this process difficult for people to work with in the beginning?  Or as Rev. Strickler keeps bringing me back to almost every time we speak in person, “Who, What, When, Where, How?”

Finally, once the veil of the persona has been lifted and the real the person is aware of the Self, the real work can begin. The questions change from what is wrong to what can be done? When will this change? Why not now?

May the subtle relentlessness of truth be ever present in your life and may you find the answers you are not yet aware you are seeking by taking the action you have yet to take.

Blessings, Adam Crosthwaite

 Copyright © 2015 by Institute of Spiritual Climate LLC


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THE PROCESS—Rewriting the Personal Operational Sequence

by Adam Crosthwaite

Rewriting the Personal Operational Sequence

The Alchemical process of becoming has never been comfortable for anyone or any living thing for that matter. Take for example, from nature, the life of a bird. The very begging of the life cycle carries with it hardships for the parent birds with keeping the eggs safe and warm and not leaving the nest for days or even weeks at a time; the parents undergo several hardships. Next comes the actual birth with the first and possible hardest physical struggle the baby bird will endure, as it struggles to break free from the shell that kept it protected from the elements until then. In this stage, the bird has to make it out of the shell in order to survive; if it is unsuccessful, it doesn’t make it beyond that point.

As a student of Ha Qabala as taught by Rev. Strickler, I have found myself faced with many layers of shell (a.k.a. barriers), each standing as a challenge to my own process of becoming. Each stage of spiritual evolution required the breaking down or dismantling of some barrier in one form or another. I have experienced these barriers as taking on forms that challenge the mind as well as one’s ability to exercise the free use of will in order to achieve the goal of continuing along the path of enlightenment. Most barriers in the beginning were straight forward and clear as to what was required; over time this becomes a little more complicated, but the basic premise still remains the same. One must ACT. The need for physical as well as the intellectual and emotional movement is required for these challenges or barriers to be overcome; this remains a constant part in this ongoing process. At times this seems to be the biggest challenge, even if only in the shadow of the mind.

At times a challenge takes too long or is missed and timing points are not met so blessings that were available are no longer attainable; in other words, certain blessings require the meeting of deadlines and overcoming of challenges in order to make one ready. As time passes and barriers are overcome, new challenges seeming to require new understanding and different approaches present themselves and new teachings or training are needed to overcome these challenges. Or is that so? Are the barriers truly requiring higher level of struggle or sacrifice in order to be overcome?

At times I found myself retracing my steps trying to decide if I truly wanted to progress and move beyond the barriers I had in front of me. There are many things these barriers hide and insulate. On one hand, I find myself claiming to have chosen to move forward, yet my actions and even inaction have proven my words meaningless. I hear people speaking of how they find themselves in similar situations, repeating old patterns and falling into a seemingly endless loop of minimal gains followed by failure over and over again. The perpetual cycle of win- fail, win-fail leads many people to give up on making any progress at all regardless of what the goal may be. At one point the drive to strike out for achievement, to break out beyond old barriers becomes an acceptance of the limitations and an adaptation to the environment of insulation that resides within the shell of insulation. It is hard to watch someone give up like this. It is much harder to realize that it is yourself that has been laying down having failed to meet a goal or miss a meeting point.

As barriers are cleared and experience is gained with each stage of the Alchemical process, there are new levels of understanding and an ongoing self-examination in order to prepare for the challenges that wait at the current level of awareness. At each level the ongoing revelation of the Universe takes on new perspectives, that in and of themselves, could be challenging on every level of awareness. There have been and continue to be times when all I want is to just forget about effort and struggle for a moment, and just rest for a tiny little minute, or two or three. I know there is a huge difference between pausing for a breath and allowing myself to slump down into the material lethargy that I miraculously find a way to keep carrying along with me on my path along the way.

It is so easy to just curl up and sleep half the day away. Far too easy to spend the day staring at the television numbing my senses and forgetting about my goals and self-respect that I managed to gain over the years by breaking through barriers along the path. The long ago adopted mentalities of competition were, if I was not able to give one hundred percent of my energy to a task, that I should not even bother is revealed as flawed. I was tired, I had a long year, I got a lot done in short period of time, the excuses drone on for days until a weekend becomes a week and then a month. Soon what was gained is obsolete and new ground is lost as a new barrier is formed. Yes, a new barrier that I myself created; most barriers are created the same way, but this one is special.

It is at this point that the mother of all gut check moments occurs, I did this. All the warnings and sign posts along the way trying to grab my attention as to what I was (or was not) doing went ignored. Now it is the teacher staring at me face to face. I can tell when he enters the room, I feel it. The words I have heard so many times before in so many different forms and yet here I am listening to them once again, as every aspect of my being comes to full awareness in this moment. “You are not done yet. Get up.”

There was a time when an experience like this would leave me shaken and I would have probably wasted energy in compensating for my mistakes using the same old tactics that helped me in creating some of my biggest barriers. I could create a whole new barrier or fortify old ones, but I was taught better than that. While I recognize that I never would have made it this far in my growth and journey through and out of the darkness of my past mistakes, I also have to realize at some point there is a reason I was helped. So in learning to use the tools of understanding to gain the riches of knowledge as I have been taught by Rev. Strickler, I know how to reach into my own situation and make adjustments. The old mind set of all or nothing can only work for so long and has so limited a range that it is time for an upgrade of new understanding.

One of the analogies Rev. Strickler uses to explain different concepts and principles of Alchemy comes from his experience in early computer programing. While he has the ability use one analogy for a seemingly endless number of explanations, this is one that sticks with me as I find our talks end up at one point including computer technology in some form. I remember he talked about the old punch card operation sequences that he would sit for hours writing (I would go nuts) and how just one misplaced comma or period would throw an entire program sequence off the mark causing a failure. The first time I heard this I remembered doing the same thing in computing class (writing out the code instead of making punch cards) and the frustration when there was a failure in the sequence. Just like the failure in my sequences that lead to the creation of a new barrier.

Regardless of how many barriers are dissolved or resolved through calcination, the process of becoming can still be hindered by the misuse of the process. After ten years of breaking out of shells and remembering the punch cards and program writing, after ten years of sitting with the master teacher (Rev. Strickler), I can see a gaping flaw in my own sequence. It is time to adjust the mentality from an “all or nothing” approach to a “do what you can with what have available to you to the best of your ability until you can do more” approach. The energy will always be there available for use, provided I continue to exercise the ability use it properly in the right form and manner. I set up the illusion of being too tired or burned out, I had more space to operate in than I did a year ago and I was too enamored with my materialist ego to realize what was going on until I was confronted with the truth.

There will always be something more, something bigger and better to reach for and to learn, there are more revelations to uncover and grow from in the ongoing process of becoming. It appears as if the drive and desire to reach can be hindered so much by perspective at times it can be frightening. We operate in a world where the most advanced technology can be bogged down by a simple misplaced comma, makes me even happier to be a human being working on becoming instead of waiting for someone else to come along and find the hanging comma that may holding me up.

The process of spiritual evolution that comes with the Alchemical work is long and can take on some interesting twists and turns. As Rev. Strickler keeps pointing out, it’s not necessarily a good thing to have a high pain threshold. Breaking through to new levels may require the pain in order to understand tolerances and other important aspects that may serve as guides and early warning systems. It is in the learning to work with what is available in the moment, not push until you feel as if you can’t move anymore, whether it be mentally, physically or otherwise, that progress is made.

There will always be a new level to reach for; that’s the good news. As far as the bad news goes, that is matter of how you want to set your sequence of operations.

Blessings, Adam Crosthwaite

Copyright © 2015 by Institute of Spiritual Climate LLC

Brain Injury Awareness Month

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Spiritual Climate Newsletter DECEMBER 2007 ~ part 5 ~ CHILDREN of CHILDREN by Adam Crosthwaite



By Adam Crosthwaite

This Holiday Season marks my fourth Christmas as a student of the Qabala as taught by the tradition that Rev. Strickler represents. After four years I have come to understand in part the underlying meaning of one of his most infamous statements, “This is going to be an important season…” Each year that I spend in this place takes me to levels of awareness ever expanding and ever changing in richness and knowledge as the journey known as Agape takes me to inner reaches I never knew existed. Last year it was a focus on Agreement Reality and the pit falls of politically correct jargon blinding people to the celebration of life and the love of those around them that presented itself to me in the form of a child. As I walked along the path of my life last year it became blaringly obvious that the human race has a long way to go in order to grow up and stop worrying about how different they are from the person standing next to them.

In the year before that it was remembering the importance of the human connection outside the limitations of material cares that emerged through memories of my friends gathering to warm themselves around a trash can the night of Christmas Eve that rang out to me from the darkness. The moment of connection with the person outshined the moments of material cares. I can still feel the warmth of my friends who invited me as a companion, not a stranger into their gathering in friendship.

And in 2004, my first year with David and the crew, it was the gift of the strength in children that inspired me to reach out from the depths to grasp the unknown heights of the mysteries in operation throughout the universes. The possibilities of the future had been unveiled to me as I watched the strength of hope carry a child from darkness and despair into a bright and promising new beginning in life. As a nation and the world over we will greatly need to tap this strength if we are to make it through the coming year.

This year finds me looking into the past, present and future of not only my own segment of time but that of the generation before me and the one behind me. One might say I have ventured into my own personalized version of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol. I find myself at a point of convergence where the past is retesting an audience with the presence and the future agreed to sit in on the meeting as well. There have been moments in these past few weeks that I have felt an empathetic view with the character Captain Jean-Luc Picard from the television show Star Trek the Next Generation (STNG) when he discovered an anomaly in space and time coming from him in the past, present and future. He had to function between the past, present and future in order to complete a puzzle and correct an error made by himself in different time lines. I laugh as I recall sitting with David in the evening during this time of year and watching the final episode of Star Trek Next Generation, Episode Number 747, entitled “All Good Things…” U.S. Airdate: June 5, 1994, his favorite episode that he shared with me my first Christmas as his student.

Throughout the years I recall moments from my past that trigger an entourage of reactions. Through the process of the teachings of the lineage that David represents, I have learned to alter these moments to aid in my growth. Instead of arguing with the shadows in my mind like a blind fool screaming at a reflection I find myself working with the various parts and pieces of myself that are seeking a way to join me in the present to grow and be with me in the moment.

On the days I am blessed to spend with my daughter Emily I am reminded of the inner child that stays with me as I grow through the years. At times I encounter the “Little Adam” who wants to spend time with the “Big Adam”. Some moments are playful and cute, like when Emily walks up to me smiling and takes me by the hand or shirt to her room and shuts the door so we can be alone to read or play. Other moments are not as playful, like when she cries because daddy was walking too fast and did not stop to watch the wind blow through the grass on a sunny day; Emily starts to cry when she looks up and sees me too far ahead. Even the times Emily comes to me crying with a bruised knee or scratched cheek for me to kiss so she can smile and say, “Much Better” reminds me of the importance in taking time to spend with myself and my smaller self to be at one with each other in the present.

For the past year now I have a job at a shopping center involving security. I have plenty of time during the day to observe people at some of their finest and most questionable moments. There are days I walk around watching the people around me scrambling to make sense of the situations and events in their days. As I watch I can’t help but notice that few, if any, of these people stop to watch the wind blowing through the grass, or allow the child inside of them take them to a quiet place for some time alone away from the craziness and frantic meanderings of a chaotic world. Every day I face off with drunks, crazy drivers, shoplifters, thugs and the occasional disgruntled shop keeper. When things get tense, I find myself stopping to watch the wind blow through the grass.

People are walking around all the time in a daze unaware of the child within their psyche screaming in their ears to hear and see it in the dark corner. They wince in pain not knowing why as the parts of them longing to break out from the darkness in the closets locked away deep within their past and summon them through the fabric of the world they operate in. These winces come in the form of reactions to other people as they encounter themselves reflected in the mirror of the subconscious. Many of them fight back against these currents of change with opiate behaviors which I can relate to from my own personal experience.

These opiate behaviors (escapism) are most evident during the Holiday season when people are in a rush to buy things to prove to themselves the value of relationships. Instead of holding in regard the connections they are blessed with by honoring what is, they unknowingly, as well as covertly, pervert the truth of the Holiday season to a time of consumption in the form of giving as they pay homage with material gifts. Sadly, as long as the status quo of the Agreement Reality is not challenged openly the currents sounding in the dark corridors of the mind will go unnoticed. No matter how loudly or how long the ghost in the hall rattles his chains, the frightened and abandoned child in the forgotten reaches will never have someone to kiss away the pain swelling in the psyche of the so called adult mind.

The drunken binges of shoppers running debt higher and higher for themselves send toxic fumes from the psyche in an effort to blur the images reaching out from the reflections in the mirror of subconscious, as it attempts to take them by the hand and spend some one on one time watching the wind blow, in my opinion and view. No amount of opiate behavior can kiss away the trauma in a harsh world. The frenzy of opiate behavior robs people of those few precious moments when the Hidden Treasures are revealed and not simply valued as a consumable item, for it is in the present with the child of the past standing along side the child of the present that the most amazing treasure is found in the discovery of knowledge, known to the Qabalistic tradition as Agape.

As long as people stay stuck spinning their wheels in place without aid from all parts of their being in the present, they will stay fixed in the illusions of weakness. In the many lessons we are gifted with none are as precious as those that come in the encounters with children, The Gift of the Child is forever with us all. Past, present and future belong to the child within us all. The world unfolds before us all as the children of children lighting a path to the future.

David is continually bringing me back to Psalm 115 vs 16:



The heavens are the heavens of the LORD

But the earth hath He given to the children of men.

This is the starting point for one point of understanding the world around us as is taught by David in the Qabalistic Tradition. We are all children; we are all responsible for our children.

As children living in worlds within a larger world, we have the ability to function in whatever mode we choose. We also have the ability to take the children of the past along with all the hurts and joys, lock them away in darkness forever and live out a life as a reactive creature bent on survival, or bring that child up from the dark to spend time in the light and grow.

Trudging about in the darkness of this mundane world I occasionally find time to stop for a second look at my circumstances, this usually takes place in time sitting in the presence of my Teacher David. In the past year I increasingly have come to take the processes learned through the Qabalistic tradition as taught by my Mentor and continue to exercise the tools and skills for evaluation and discernment for myself and my relationship with the world I function in, as well as the worlds in motion around me. At times it seems that the world is out to destroy itself, other times it seems to be fighting for survival against the numerous currents. Usually those may usher a change for the greater good and well being of those concerned. Currents that are sometimes initiated by the subconscious portions of the mind seeking a resolution to chaos go on ignored or forcibly suppressed. Ironically, the very changes initiated within a world for the well being of that world are at times fought against the fiercest of all.

Children need to be allowed to cry. No matter what age or gender, they have a place in the world. For too long I have waited to allow those parts of me to come out and play. For long enough I have hidden the shame and guilt of moments that could have been handled in a better way. For far too long has the twelve year old cowered in the corner and the five year old gone unheard, and this year they will be there on Christmas day standing along side the me that is now, watching the sun rise. They will learn from me to grow and trek the mundane world by my side. I will learn to change my world for the better with the lessons they learn in the world we will share.

Blessings to the Children of Children of Men, All of Us!

Adam Crosthwaite


you know you want to do it:

Spiritual Climate Newsletter OCTOBER 2007 ~ part 4 ~ FEAR’S REBELLION by Adam Crosthwaite


Fear’s Rebellion

By Adam Crosthwaite

Fear can block us all from living a complete life. The fear of an unknown can become an unnecessary trial for the mind and heart to endure if one does not chose to embrace the fear rather than live under the influence of an unknown. The embracing of fear comes when one accepts the knowledge of a limitation thus opening them to the probability that they will overcome the fearful situation. The acceptance of fear is to move through it, not to allow it to move through you taking control over the reasoning faculty by hot wiring the emotional portions of the psyche. It has been hard for me to comprehend this phenomenon. It was when I was presented with a situation where I was in fact blocking myself from experiencing life with the shield of fear that I created with a false belief for many years. Through the teaching and guidance I have been blessed with during my studies in the Art of Qabala I have come to an abstract understanding of this phenomenon and how it played a central part in my life over the years. Still with this understanding I was missing a part of the picture that would give an opening for me to express the abstract concept in a form suitable for communication in the physical world. This form was sorely missed as it was and continues to be a focal point in my growth as a human being.

I was given a new focal point for expression during one of my courses in Business Communications. By attention having a focus in an area that required some personal growth I found myself polarized into a situation that lead me toward a new understanding. The effect of attraction literally brought me face to face with not only a fresh perspective but challenged me to face off with one of my own personal fears, a fear it turns out was shared by someone very close to me.

During an assignment for my course in communications I was introduced to Social Judgment Theory. I was so excited about this topic that when I was invited to write a paper on a topic of my choosing I dug right into this one. Social Judgment Theory was like candy for my mind! It gave me a perspective by which to explore and elaborate my understanding of life and experiences with people as well as insight into myself. This may sound silly to most people but this was indeed a breakthrough for me to be able to express an understanding in a way that is comprehendible and usable in further dialog with my writing and correspondence with the world.

Social Judgment Theory encompasses the taboos, folk ways and morays of society and is a subjective frame of reference through which people perceive the world around them. The points at which we internalize experiences to form beliefs are known as internal anchors. Internal anchors are also referred to in neurological terms as Meta Tags. These anchors are psychological impressions imprinted in the personality and ego by cultural influences as well as life experiences which include both positive events and traumatic experiences.

The majority of these anchors are pliable or in other words they are not so rigid that a person may not be accepting of new concepts as long as the new concept is within their latitude of acceptance. This latitude of acceptance may be looked at as a parameter that surrounds this anchor point. Within the parameter several concepts which closely match the nuances of the anchor point may be introduced and a person may be swayed to agree with a concept or view that may be of contrast to their previous point of perception. This realignment may occur with only a minor or even greater range depending on the fixity of their anchor point. Another way of looking at this is to use the example of suggestive advertising and/or subliminal communications which use Meta Tags.

As it turns out I had a fixed anchor point that was an effect I had been polarized toward which set quite a bit of imbalance in my perception of things. I was in an invisible prison of fear that could only be unlocked by facing that fear and embracing the truth that waited intently for me on the other side.

This fear was exposed in the open as I attempted to set a new order into my life by seeking out my dad whom I never had the chance to know. For over a year I had been looking for my birth father. I spent countless hours online looking up old addresses and names trying to find a man I never knew. I now see the fear that kept me from meeting him was not my own. As time effort drew us closer to each other I spoke with him for the first time on the phone. I realized that I had adopted a fear as my own like an inheritance passed down by relatives. I can not speak on the origin of this fear or even if it is a rational fear, for it was originally not my own. It is a fear that only secrets can breed and I was not privileged to information that would lend insight into this fear. Many things from my past as a child had been set aside by those around me and conveniently forgotten as to insulate me from the knowing I so desperately had been seeking but lacking in my fear. All I know is this fear was based on an anchor point that may never be swayed and has little if any latitude of acceptance. As much as I do know, it was misplaced on my part for reasons I have yet to uncover, but I will continue the internal as well as external dialogue with this subject to continue my growth and to understand this as much as I can.

If not for the drive to uncover my fear and face the truth that awaited me on the other side I would have never met my dad. For years I had wondered if I was going to learn about my paternal line. Now that I had found a way to connect with my past I could understand more of my present and see part of what was to come. I cannot express in words the feeling of embracing the man I only knew in stories and learning the other side of the story from the man himself. For years I was told about the negative aspects of a man I never knew and was conditioned to fear. Yes, there is a past full of pain and regret, but amends has been made and a future can be built on a stronger, new foundation. And after fifteen years from the last time we talked I was reunited with my dad.

It seemed fitting that this reunion occurred during the week I was to write my paper on Social Judgment Theory, seeing how it was a social judgment on the part of family that kept us out of contact for nearly twenty seven years. The idea of Social Judgment Theory continues to aid me in my quest to shed light into dark corners of my mind that thirst for illumination.

There is a continuation in this world of anchor points that plague our society with unhealthy views and perceptions. One of the biggest anchor points I see in society today, especially in my generation, is the concept of rebelling against authority. In my own struggle against authority I have seen my world crumble time and time again. David, being the ever patient and caring mentor, continues to sit with me in an ever evolving dialogue on this topic. The Qabalistic tradition teaches us that when we rebel against authority we eventually end up rebelling against ourselves. This happens because we are ultimately in charge of our own life. We are our own authority. As we rebel against ourselves we end up undoing all that we have worked for.

While it is healthy to question authority we lack prudence which is more often overlooked than exercised, it is merely left out of the equation. Thus no buffer is left to protect against fallacious reasoning and the behaviors it is accompanied by. If we are to gain dominion over the lives we share, perhaps it would be prudent to exercise the concepts that are learned in the study of such theories such as Social Judgment Theory.

If we are to apply the meaning of questioning authority to social judgment we would need to examine the perception of the authority as it seemingly stands. We would also need to examine our personal perception and frame of reference in relation to authority. In short we should be questioning perception, not authority. It is in the perception of authority that we find our struggles and personal internal anchors, not in the toe to toe stand off with an opposing perception. Do you remember the student who asked the Master how to fight with out fighting? If you remember, the Master said, “You watch.”

How do we break out of the destructive cycle of self-rebellion? We watch! We discern for ourselves the false perceptions and destructive tendencies of self inflected rebellions. We correct our own errors by questioning the perception and examining the full picture.

The goal is to break the cycle of unipolarization and release our locked perception to navigate closer to the balance that exists in the middle path, or in other words, stop being so damn one sided all the time! Then we can experience freedom from the effects of unhealthy anchor points that hinder our progress through life. Of course we are always free to remain locked in the stalemate of fear and be consumed by the wailing and gnashing of teeth as we attempt to insulate from the discomfort of truth. At times it may appear that the most difficult anchors are those based in fear, especially in cases where as the fear is ego evolved and the thought of being wrong is the anchor itself. It is in the journey through the perception of fear that the fear is exposed and can be dealt with accordingly, be it with professional help or a mentor.

We may never find ourselves in a society free from misperceptions and fallacious beliefs. We may find ourselves at odds with our own authority thus backed into a corner with a seemingly no win situation. However, if we learn to question the perceptions of our authority and the authority we freely place in the hands of others from time to time, we may gain clear insights and intimate healthy changes in our own worlds so we may share them as a society. The Socratic method David uses and teaches his students has been the crux of our learning and, while I may not speak for my fellow students, I find myself lead by this life line through some of the deepest and darkest of waters.

We will never overcome the fear that divides us from the truth until we are polarized toward that truth. In order to achieve that we must focus our abilities to question and use that strength to set a new order into our lives as I have been taught by my Mentor and the teachings of Qabala.

I would like to leave you with a quote from a favorite song of mine. It is a song about a man who spends his life looking for and waiting for someone or something that is missing from his life. He wades through torments and fears along his path, yet he holds to one simple rule that keeps him from fleeing the path he has chosen to walk. It is a constant reminder to me of where I have been and where I will be going.

“If I close my mind in fear, please pry it open…”

– Metallica, Outlaw Torn

May you find the anchors that weigh you down and keep you in the darkest depths, and may we all be able to share in a world blessed by truth along with the courage to uphold that truth.


Adam Crosthwaite


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Spiritual Climate Newsletter APRIL 2007 ~ part 2 ESCAPING THE REALM of UNIPOLAR EXISTENCE by Adam Crosthwaite



Escaping the Realm of Unipolar Existence

By Adam Crosthwaite

From the past to the present and on through the future it is impossible to track the growth one experiences without the contrast afforded to us by time as it fuels our momentum in the space we operate in throughout this process. One way of looking at this is to think about a garden. From seeds to flowers, and in time even fruit, the contrast in form and function continually change from the first stages of growth to the final harvest, be it roses for a loved one or vegetables to feed a family. Over time the growth process takes place within the physical forms that started as seeds produced by the growth process of the previous generation. Still, a garden does not grow all by itself. Someone has to nurture and aid in the growth process to insure a healthy harvest. This is much like the mentoring process (only after another fashion) experienced by students in schools of spiritual development. Without someone to tend the process there is no harvest. For that person to watch over, nurture, guide, and teach they must have been guided through the same process by another mentor brought up within the same tradition, whatever that tradition may be.

Through the mentoring process many people find themselves opening doors to find themselves. Through a true spiritual tradition one finds their true self and learns to unlock the secrets of an ever unfolding universe. Within these traditions there are many manuscripts that are written records for the tradition leaving instructions and methods to future students. Many of these manuscripts are encoded. For obvious reasons it takes a mentorship process to properly develop in any tradition, but with the traditions themselves there is an oral tradition which holds the keys to the encrypted messages of the tradition as well as a system of checks and balances. There are several reasons for this double blind approach to mentoring in a spiritual tradition. One of the biggest and most overlooked reasons is human error in the form of our own personal IGNORANCE.

Now remember we are living in a world of truncated views. This world is full of feel good happy sunshine people who think life is like Saturday morning cartoons, people who perhaps need to learn that the Care Bears are not real! Imagine that one or a group of these people get their hands on a bit of information and decide to start the latest “feel good movement” in a country of individuals who feel they are running for cover with targets painted on their backs. The ignorance resulting from a society pacified by truncated versions of the truth coupled with the need for security and a sense of control, an illusion almost as grand as the one presented in the theory of attraction being paraded around as the latest form of the emperor’s new clothes in the media, would give anyone an opening to manipulate and persuade vast numbers of people. Of course there is a plethora of plausible explanations other than being manipulated by a hunger for the illusion of control. As a side note I would like to point out that this illusion is not a defense for people who “lose control” over their own behaviors, just like the Law of Attraction is being misused as a defense as victim precipitation.

Now it may be a process of miscommunication or perhaps an attempt at control by misinformation or any number of “reasonable” explanations for people to accept what sounds good, but there truly is no good reason or explanation for the ignorant behavior of accepting theories because they simply sound good. If the human race has evolved out of the darkness of the Middle Ages and the Sophist’s contempt for discomfort, we should all look to expand our processes in reasoning and discernment.

If there is to be a contrast to the maladjusted adolescent stage of development one must undergo a growth process and learn to examine the whole picture without disregarding that which is hidden beyond the senses. In many cases it would take a very small degree of adjustment to expand a perception. Look at it as if you were watching a sunset through a window. If there is a tree in the middle of your view you can’t see the full sunset, but if you sit down or step to the side you may see the sunset clearly with out looking through the tree branches. You can see all of the colors and shadows at the same time, yet people still take small bits of information and form theories. They do not take the time to evaluate the full context of the situation. We live in an age where all you need is an hour on the internet to research different opinions and views on any subject, yet many people are content to accept truncated views and perceptions. They are choosing to behave as if this were the Middle Ages and only the privileged are allowed to read and comprehend.

There has been a growing awareness in this world and it has been cultivated by several traditions and by many trials in the lives of those who tread the harsh terrain of Truth. Anyone who has spent the time and cultivated a reasoning faculty even in some of the beginning stages of a truly Spiritual Tradition would know better than to accept half a picture. It would appear that the only valid reason for the acceptance of truncated perceptions would be a lax reasoning faculty. With a mentorship process that monitors and facilitates the true learning curve of the universe people develop skill and knowledge in order to discern a clearer and far more accurate picture of a situation. I don’t know how many times Rev. Strickler has told me in the middle of a lecture that he will answer my question after I come back from doing a little background research on a topic, or two, or three.

One of the first lessons and perhaps the most basic concept I learned in my process was the art of examining the full spectrum of any given situation. This was taught by the A and not A approach to examination. It means literally asking the question “what is this” followed by “what is this not”? This opens the mind to examine the full spectrum or rather POLARITY of the situation. The tradition of Qabala examines the full spectrum of polarity in order to find balance within a world that finds itself polarized to extreme points of difference. How does a person find balance without first examining the extremes in order to lend a point of contrast which allows that person to find a centered position and come to understand the truth of a situation?

Ironically people are already taught this concept particularly in the business world under the heading: Cultural Diversity. In short people are told not to take things for granted that there are multiple views and ways of approaching life. The contrasting of different cultures increases the sensitivity of people toward varied cultural experiences by teaching that them that there are alternative means of accomplishing tasks and living, that other ways are just as effective if not more so if applied properly. Talk about drawing people’s attention to contrasting differences! If people would use this same formula of contrasting differences and similarities in other situations on a regular basis this world would run a lot smoother than it has been.

People are encouraged to live in acceptance of one another through contrasting differences and honoring the fact that there is more to a person than meets the eye but they rarely extend that contrast to other areas of discernment. If we are truly a society of tolerance and acceptance then why is it so difficult to tolerate the acceptance of truths when it appears as if society is so accepting of ignorance?

If I were to answer this question with the same logic as the people accepting the Law of Attraction as a “Law” I would have to say that it is choice of ignorance that allows its acceptance in society. If I were to answer this question as a person who has a basic understanding of the Principle of Polarity I would say that it is the ignorance of a society that allows the furtherance of ignorance. The latter of the two responses would be my starting point for the application of the A and not A formula.

The acceptance of truncated perceptions by a society leads to a UNIPOLAR society with a small number, usually one, of the people controlling the vast majority. Unipolar is a term used to describe the diagnosis of Major Depressive Disorder in contrast to Bipolar Disorder in clinical terminology. Basically a person who suffers from this disorder will stay at the depressive end of the spectrum. Polarized toward depression they will have difficulty with a balanced perception, not too dissimilar to the difficulty one faces in life with a Unipolar view of the world. It is the effect of attraction to this end of the spectrum by the Principle of Polarity that is expressed in the physical world. Attraction itself cannot be a Law as it is an Effect in the physical world or rather a perception of some who are stuck in the realm of truncated perception and self deception having been polarized toward ignorance by choice.

It would seem fitting to end on a clinical definition to lend contrast to the behaviors exhibited by members of today’s society, but we would all do well to remember that we can only view the behavior itself. There is a lot more going on within the situation than what may be perceived from a distance.

May the evolution of human consciousness guide you to brighter sunsets of contrasting light and color.


Adam Crosthwaite



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