Damn Him, He Is Right—Again!
By Christine Ford
It’s that time of year once again! Seems the older I get, the faster time whizzes by, especially at this season of year. Remember being a child and waiting for Christmas? It seemed like an eternity, especially those four weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Once Thanksgiving was over, it was as if a Giant reached down from on high and held back the hands of the Eternal Clock of Time, squeezing with all his might and turning hours into days, days into weeks. Now, as adults, don’t you find that it is exactly the opposite? It is as if the Energizer Bunny grabs hold of the same hands of that Eternal Clock of Time and faster than the Road Runner can say “Beep, Beep!”, those hands take on a whole new speed of light pace as you find yourself shaking your head and saying, “How did this happen? Where is the time going?”
We barely get the Thanksgiving leftovers put in the fridge only to find we have Santa, the eight reindeer, the elves and CONSUMERISM breathing down the back of our necks, chanting the ever growing mantra of purchase-mad propaganda, telling you just what material items need to be exchanged to make this the most perfect Holiday Season ever. Christmas Carols being blasted 24-7, all the while delivering the UNHOLY Holy-day (Holiday) message of buy, buy, buy, more, more, more, faster, faster, faster! WHEW! I often wonder if Santa’s appearance at the end of that beautifully traditional MACY’S Thanksgiving Day Parade was a foreshadowing of the dawn of our current consumer driven society condensing that shopping frenzy into the seemingly shortened time that now exists between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Were we as an entire generation brainwashed by the seemingly innocent arrival of Santa at the end of that parade, viewed even before the Thanksgiving dinner was served, followed by the rash of old and new made for TV specials of the Christmas Season? Something to think about, anyway!
What really intrigues me about the whole “time speed up thing” though is that increasingly it is not just adults who feel that way! My handicapped kids at school have been saying, “Gee, we just had Thanksgiving. How can it be time for Christmas already?” My five year old granddaughter who has been talking to me about my coming visit during the holidays just commented with a note of disbelief in her voice, “Gaga AZ! It’s almost time for you to come and see me. It seemed like it would be a long time, but all of a sudden it is time for you to come.” From the mouths of babes! So you see, the hurried rush to purchase of “gifts” of the Season and frantic push to attend parties, celebrations and spread Yuletide Cheer in a disgusting, offensive debauchery of the reverence for the Light and Love which graces the world sadly and increasingly unnoticed this Holy Season isn’t just for adults anymore. The innocence of even the children has been compromised as well by the blatant commercialization of an event and a time of year so Holy that it defies description.
My past pattern has been to LOVE every second of the holidays, to relish every greeting and memory, to search for treasures to share with those I love while humming along with the piped in Christmas Carols, to bake cookies, go to parties, and to enter wholeheartedly into the festivities of the so-called Christmas Spirit. This year I seem to have hit a dead-end in that area of response, a hundred foot high brick wall that I find myself unable to climb over, go around, or dig under. There appears to be no door to pass through to the other side, so I find myself sitting there, unable to move or function, permeated with an almost tangible numbness, a disassociation from all the busy-ness going on around me, as if a bubble of isolation, a cloak of invisibility, has surrounded me and pulled me into its quiet, dark, silent womb.
Instead of excitedly preparing and planning, I find myself being overwhelmed by a questioning, a yearning, a silence and an exquisite, profound emptiness; a desire to just be alone and allow myself the time and space to hear the resounding voices of those celestial hosts of Angels that the Christmas Carols and legends speak of. Attempting to think in terms of what has been my "traditional" celebration of the season, I am paralyzed, saddened beyond words that the sacred and joyous time of year in which the world awakens and is reborn anew to the Light and Love of the Infinite has become a sham, as well as a shame.
I must admit that I believe Dr. Strickler had a hand in pre-empting this response that I am having with a simple statement he made before Thanksgiving that the holidays this year would take on a whole different flavor for all of us within his classes. Being the somewhat eternal optimist that I have been striving to corral and contain for the past thirteen years, I immediately began projecting images of beauty and splendor surpassing the “wonderful”, at least in my limited perception, Christmas experiences of years past. I have always regarded it as a “magical” and sacred time, and in my imaginings, it could only get more radiant and glorious, so I was ready and waiting for the grand epiphany which I had built up in my mind from Dr. Strickler‘s simple statement of fact! Hhhhmmmm. . .
The wanderings of an unrestrained imagination can lead to delusion and set one up for disappointment, as was the beginning of my response when immediately upon finishing Thanksgiving dinner, I was assaulted by the pounding, hammering question of “IS THAT ALL THERE IS? WHAT JUST HAPPENED?” That all pervasive feeling of doubt and questioning has not for a moment diminished, and has lead me to ponder just what it is that I have celebrated and joyously regaled for all my years of this lifetime, out of a learned and repeated response to patterns instilled in me and upon me by family, society, friends, and , most importantly, my own stupidity, ignorance, herd instincts and blindness.
In the past I have experienced similar feelings of doubt and “What‘s it all about” type questioning, though never with the depth and power of this time. In the years of my inward exploration, as these feelings of emptiness and isolation engulfed me, I have reacted by being terrified and have fought with all my might like a person drowning, the impinging waves of seeming separation from all that I know and am within the physical definition of “myself“, in a state of near panic as I viewed the experience as one of irrational behavior. This time, however, I find I am welcoming the solitude, embracing the detachment, and allowing what I have now come to recognize without fear as the contact with the greater portion of what I truly am, Spirit and Soul coming into manifestation, if for only a brief moment within the confines of emptiness.
This is the true gift of Christmas, the discovery and acceptance of that Holy Light and Love which each one of us is a spark of, spiraling into this physical plane of dense manifestation. The intensity of allowing contact with that spark, gently fanning it, tenderly caressing it, nurturing it, holding your breath while the soft glow becomes an ember, talking with it, silently awaiting a whispered, sometimes shouted, answer, being alone on that starry night of Christmas Eve at midnight and gazing up and out into the infinite velvet blackness that surrounds and sustains us as we simultaneously dive deeply within to the corresponding infinite innermost sanctum of Who and What we truly are, Soul and Spirit in manifestation. THIS is what the meaning of Christmas has become for me, and this is a humble expression of that which I hold in regard and strive to share with not only each reader of the Spiritual Climate Newsletter, but each and every person with whom I have contact.
As I find happens more and more frequently, as I struggled to put into words my Christmas thoughts, my daughter, who has become my cherished friend as well, Jessica, called me to read a writing she had found while doing some inner exploring. There was no author listed, so there is no one to credit the simplicity and clarity of the words she sent me, but it echoes on a more exoteric level the experience of “Becoming”, which I have alluded to. I quote:
“After a while, we can learn the subtle differences between holding a hand and chaining a soul. And we can learn that love doesn’t mean leaving, and company doesn’t mean security. And we begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts, and presents aren’t promises. And we begin to accept our defeats with our head up and our eyes open with the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child. And we learn to build our roads on today, because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans. After a while, we learn that even sunshine burns if we get too much.
So . . . plant your own Soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. And we learn that we really can endure. . . That we are strong, and we really do have worth.”
May you, this Blessed Holiday Season, capture a glimpse of the one true image formed from the likeness of the Creator itself, the Light which created a spark which in turn gave birth to that star called You, born in the heavens. This is the True You, and the experience of the revelation of your Soul your Spirit.